I've written here before about the power of music. Everyone is different and the way music effects them differs as well. For some people music is background noise, a soundtrack playing in the background of their life. For others it's an integral part of their life. It can some times be the only understanding embrace someone receives. Music can be uplifting, motivating, understanding, and so many things all at once. That's what makes it so wonderful. While most of the music I have shared with you on here has been from The Smashing Pumpkins, believe it or not I do like all different kinds of music. Still, the Smashing Pumpkins is and always will be my favorite :-).
However, I felt that this song deserved it's own personal entry. It's a song by Linkin Park. The video is amazingly beautiful and I can't get enough of the song, the lyrics are amazing. It was months ago that I first heard this song. I am sure I had "heard" it before that but it didn't sink in until a few months ago when I really heard it. This song really helped me move on from something I had been holding in for over a decade. Like I said, music is powerful..and I hope you have found music in your own life that has touched you, helped you, comforted you, motivated you...moved you.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
12 Years!
In just a little under 2 weeks it will be the 12 year anniversary of the day Matt and I met!
I am going to be very busy these next few weeks so I thought I would go ahead and post this now.
I don't think I could have ever guessed that 12 years could fly by so fast! There were so many times that our paths crossed before we ever met and I feel truly lucky that we finally did meet. The day we met I knew that Matt was something special, and was I ever right. It's a truly amazing thing to find that one person in the world who completes you. "I dunno, she's got gaps, I got gaps, together we fill gaps." That is a quote from one of our favorite movies, Rocky. That's how I feel about us. I feel like he makes me a better person and when there's times that I feel like I'm not enough..he fills the gaps and makes me whole again. Here we are 12 years later with two wonderful sons and I still find new things to love about him.
I love you with all my heart Matt. Thank you for supporting me in everything I do and giving me the strength to try new things. Thank you for making me laugh until I cry and thank you for letting me cry until I can smile again. Thank you for taking care of me no matter how much of a baby I am when I'm sick. Thank you for listening but more than that, thank you for hearing me in a way no one else does. Thank you for our wonderful sons and thank you for being a great dad. Finally, thank you for 12 years of YOU. I love you.
I am going to be very busy these next few weeks so I thought I would go ahead and post this now.
I don't think I could have ever guessed that 12 years could fly by so fast! There were so many times that our paths crossed before we ever met and I feel truly lucky that we finally did meet. The day we met I knew that Matt was something special, and was I ever right. It's a truly amazing thing to find that one person in the world who completes you. "I dunno, she's got gaps, I got gaps, together we fill gaps." That is a quote from one of our favorite movies, Rocky. That's how I feel about us. I feel like he makes me a better person and when there's times that I feel like I'm not enough..he fills the gaps and makes me whole again. Here we are 12 years later with two wonderful sons and I still find new things to love about him.
I love you with all my heart Matt. Thank you for supporting me in everything I do and giving me the strength to try new things. Thank you for making me laugh until I cry and thank you for letting me cry until I can smile again. Thank you for taking care of me no matter how much of a baby I am when I'm sick. Thank you for listening but more than that, thank you for hearing me in a way no one else does. Thank you for our wonderful sons and thank you for being a great dad. Finally, thank you for 12 years of YOU. I love you.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Monday, March 14, 2011
Epilepsy Awareness
Support the Global day for Epilepsy Awareness by wearing purple on March 26th.
http://www.purpleday.org/
http://www.purpleday.org/
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Basketball
Better late than never right?
Every Thursday Matthew brings home a packet of papers from school. I don't know what the technical name of this packet of papers is, I just know that I look forward to my "Thursday packet" every week. I love going through all of the papers and seeing what new events are coming up at school. When Matthew was in Kindergarten he brought home one of these packets and inside was a paper about joining the basketball team. I looked at it briefly and noticed that you had to be in 2nd grade to sign up. In what feels like the blink of an eye, Matthew completed Kindergarten, then completed 1st grade, and before I knew it I was going through a Thursday packet when I came across a paper about basketball sign ups. Now he is in the 2nd grade and old enough to play. How did the time from Kindergarten to 2nd grade fly by so quickly?
Matthew was so excited to sign up! Before practices could get under way they wanted all of the new players to come and have a mini basketball clinic so the coaches could see what they already knew.
Finally, it was time for practices to begin. I loved watching the practices. For this being Matthew's first year I thought he did so well! He just had fun and that's the most important thing. It was almost time for the season to start when the team got their uniforms. 
I was very impressed with Matthew's coach. He had a great attitude and gave a lot of positive reinforcement! Throughout the season I saw Matthew learn new things, have fun, and grow as a player. The thing that made me most proud of him was his attitude. He was happy for his teammates, kind, and even if they lost a game he would run over to us at the end with a smile on his face. He has the best attitude when it comes to sports and it makes me so proud. I love that he is happy for other people's accomplishments and also his own, but the main thing is that he just has fun and that is great to see.
At the end of the season there was a skills competition. All the teams came and competed in different events. At the end there was a ceremony to congratulate everyone on a great season in which each kid received a medal. Then, they gave awards for kids who placed 1st and 2nd in the skills competition. Matthew won a 2nd place trophy!!! I was so happy for him! He was happy too!
I'm so happy that Matthew found something that he really enjoys doing. I can't wait for next season! Go Little Bridgers!!!
Every Thursday Matthew brings home a packet of papers from school. I don't know what the technical name of this packet of papers is, I just know that I look forward to my "Thursday packet" every week. I love going through all of the papers and seeing what new events are coming up at school. When Matthew was in Kindergarten he brought home one of these packets and inside was a paper about joining the basketball team. I looked at it briefly and noticed that you had to be in 2nd grade to sign up. In what feels like the blink of an eye, Matthew completed Kindergarten, then completed 1st grade, and before I knew it I was going through a Thursday packet when I came across a paper about basketball sign ups. Now he is in the 2nd grade and old enough to play. How did the time from Kindergarten to 2nd grade fly by so quickly?
Matthew was so excited to sign up! Before practices could get under way they wanted all of the new players to come and have a mini basketball clinic so the coaches could see what they already knew.
Finally, it was time for practices to begin. I loved watching the practices. For this being Matthew's first year I thought he did so well! He just had fun and that's the most important thing. It was almost time for the season to start when the team got their uniforms. 
I was very impressed with Matthew's coach. He had a great attitude and gave a lot of positive reinforcement! Throughout the season I saw Matthew learn new things, have fun, and grow as a player. The thing that made me most proud of him was his attitude. He was happy for his teammates, kind, and even if they lost a game he would run over to us at the end with a smile on his face. He has the best attitude when it comes to sports and it makes me so proud. I love that he is happy for other people's accomplishments and also his own, but the main thing is that he just has fun and that is great to see.
At the end of the season there was a skills competition. All the teams came and competed in different events. At the end there was a ceremony to congratulate everyone on a great season in which each kid received a medal. Then, they gave awards for kids who placed 1st and 2nd in the skills competition. Matthew won a 2nd place trophy!!! I was so happy for him! He was happy too!
I'm so happy that Matthew found something that he really enjoys doing. I can't wait for next season! Go Little Bridgers!!!
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
When I grow up?
What do you want to be when you grow up? I love asking my sons this question. Every time you ask them you never really know what you are going to get. I actually had this conversation with Matthew and Riley this afternoon. Matthew initiated the conversation by asking Riley "what do you want to be when you grow up?" Riley responded, "a scientist!". I then asked Matthew the same question and he replied "a police officer, or a shark doctor!" However, when I went to relay this cute story to Matt this evening, Riley was very quick to tell us all that he had changed his mind. I love that every day they have new ideas of what they want to be or what they are interested in. However, it really got me thinking about this topic. Why does asking what someone wants to be automatically correspond with what profession, job, money making activity, they will pursue as an adult? Not that it's bad to think of those things, in fact it's good, it's great to have an idea of a career that will make you happy.
Still, I can't help but feel like while encouraging those things, wouldn't it also be a good idea to remind our kids (and ourselves) that what you do/your job isn't necessarily who you ARE. I guess I should say it isn't all of who you are, it's just a part of it. Who you are isn't just what job you have, it's who you are on the INSIDE. I think back to when I was my sons ages and when I was a kid my dad was my hero, not because he was in the Navy (which is very hero worthy) but because he's my dad. My mom was my hero, not for working at my school (which was pretty cool as well) but because she's my mom. I think my kids feel the same way.
I've found myself saying.."Well, I guess I just don't know what I want to be 'when I grow up'," when people (even strangers) have asked "well, so what are you going to be??" I guess I've discovered something, I already am what I want to "be" and I guess that doesn't fit in any type of box or label. I'm not an attorney, a nurse, a teacher, a real estate agent..etc. I don't currently have a job title but that's not what makes me who I am. What makes me who I am is what's always been inside of me. I live a lot of my life inside of my own head, in other words, I think A LOT. I'm constantly thinking of how can I do this, how can I accomplish that, oh this would be a great idea, what time does Matthew need to be here, oh Riley wanted that shirt washed, hmm..what would Matt want for dinner. I guess if I had to answer the question of "So, what did you end up being when you grew up?" I would have to answer, I'm a mother who loves my kids more than anything, a mother who finally found her purpose in life through her children. I'm a wife that loves her husband and would do absolutely anything for him. I love to create. Writing, painting, photography...give me something ordinary and I'll find the beauty in it. Finally, I'm me..I'm a worry wart, I'm overly sensitive, I don't let many people close to me, I love to laugh and make others laugh, I can be goofy and silly and intensely serious. Whatever job I end up having in my life when my kids are both a bit older, whether it's living my dream of doing what I love or working in the cafeteria at my kid's school so I can be home when they are home, I will bring all of those things to anything I do.
I used to be ashamed when people would talk about their jobs, careers, and "what they want to be when they grow up," I felt like I was lost and floating out there with no direction. It wasn't until today that I realized I'm not floating and lost, I'm found here in my family. Matt and the boys have given me something that I don't know how I can ever thank them, they gave me such support and love to know that I'll never be lost because I have them to anchor me and catch me if I ever fall.
So, I hope that my sons know that whatever they decide to do with their lives as far as jobs go I hope they find something that will make them happy and something that will help them be productive and satisfied, but also that what's inside is such an important part of what they are going to "be" when they grow up...and what they are inside is beautiful and to me they are incredible and my inspiration.
Still, I can't help but feel like while encouraging those things, wouldn't it also be a good idea to remind our kids (and ourselves) that what you do/your job isn't necessarily who you ARE. I guess I should say it isn't all of who you are, it's just a part of it. Who you are isn't just what job you have, it's who you are on the INSIDE. I think back to when I was my sons ages and when I was a kid my dad was my hero, not because he was in the Navy (which is very hero worthy) but because he's my dad. My mom was my hero, not for working at my school (which was pretty cool as well) but because she's my mom. I think my kids feel the same way.
I've found myself saying.."Well, I guess I just don't know what I want to be 'when I grow up'," when people (even strangers) have asked "well, so what are you going to be??" I guess I've discovered something, I already am what I want to "be" and I guess that doesn't fit in any type of box or label. I'm not an attorney, a nurse, a teacher, a real estate agent..etc. I don't currently have a job title but that's not what makes me who I am. What makes me who I am is what's always been inside of me. I live a lot of my life inside of my own head, in other words, I think A LOT. I'm constantly thinking of how can I do this, how can I accomplish that, oh this would be a great idea, what time does Matthew need to be here, oh Riley wanted that shirt washed, hmm..what would Matt want for dinner. I guess if I had to answer the question of "So, what did you end up being when you grew up?" I would have to answer, I'm a mother who loves my kids more than anything, a mother who finally found her purpose in life through her children. I'm a wife that loves her husband and would do absolutely anything for him. I love to create. Writing, painting, photography...give me something ordinary and I'll find the beauty in it. Finally, I'm me..I'm a worry wart, I'm overly sensitive, I don't let many people close to me, I love to laugh and make others laugh, I can be goofy and silly and intensely serious. Whatever job I end up having in my life when my kids are both a bit older, whether it's living my dream of doing what I love or working in the cafeteria at my kid's school so I can be home when they are home, I will bring all of those things to anything I do.
I used to be ashamed when people would talk about their jobs, careers, and "what they want to be when they grow up," I felt like I was lost and floating out there with no direction. It wasn't until today that I realized I'm not floating and lost, I'm found here in my family. Matt and the boys have given me something that I don't know how I can ever thank them, they gave me such support and love to know that I'll never be lost because I have them to anchor me and catch me if I ever fall.
So, I hope that my sons know that whatever they decide to do with their lives as far as jobs go I hope they find something that will make them happy and something that will help them be productive and satisfied, but also that what's inside is such an important part of what they are going to "be" when they grow up...and what they are inside is beautiful and to me they are incredible and my inspiration.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Matthew is 8 years old! (January 1st)
I was too sick to write this entry when I wanted to write it. This was actually the first year since Matthew was born that I was unable to stay up and watch the ball drop on his birthday (New Year's). I was just too sick.
8 years ago on New Year's Eve I went into labor with my first son. After a long and hard labor Matthew James Jr was finally born at 4:57pm on New Year's Day. I couldn't have asked for a better way to start a new year.
Our little family has come a long way in these last 8 years. It is truly amazing how fast time passes by when you have kids. It feels like yesterday that I was holding him for the first time in the hospital.
Matthew is growing into such a funny, caring, and smart kid. I always tell Matt (Sr) that both of our sons are the best of each us. I can definitely see that in Matthew. He has his dad's caring heart, my sense of humor, and he is just so smart.
I feel very lucky to have 2 wonderful sons that make me happy every single day. I am proud of them for everything they do. Being their mom is what I was put on this earth for and I feel so lucky for my family.
Happy Birthday Matthew!
8 years ago on New Year's Eve I went into labor with my first son. After a long and hard labor Matthew James Jr was finally born at 4:57pm on New Year's Day. I couldn't have asked for a better way to start a new year.
Our little family has come a long way in these last 8 years. It is truly amazing how fast time passes by when you have kids. It feels like yesterday that I was holding him for the first time in the hospital.
Matthew is growing into such a funny, caring, and smart kid. I always tell Matt (Sr) that both of our sons are the best of each us. I can definitely see that in Matthew. He has his dad's caring heart, my sense of humor, and he is just so smart.
I feel very lucky to have 2 wonderful sons that make me happy every single day. I am proud of them for everything they do. Being their mom is what I was put on this earth for and I feel so lucky for my family.
Happy Birthday Matthew!
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